are you staring at me because are you not looking at me because you don’t like me because you don’t desire me because i don’t like myself because i wish i was like you am i safe here where are the others like me there are no others like me i was not considered because i was only considered because why would you say that i thought you cared me did you say that because do i respond how do i respond in a way you will hear me how do i respond without making you angry or uncomfortable can i be okay with not responding why doesn’t someone else respond i shouldn’t have said anything are you ignoring me because i responded there has to be another explanation maybe i am making this up maybe i am too sensitive maybe i am too defensive maybe i am undesirable not everything is because i can’t assume the worst of course i am safe here of course there are others like me here you probably haven’t seen someone like me i just need to work harder you don’t know how to think about this you didn’t mean what you said of course you care about me of course you will hear me maybe it’s good for you to be uncomfortable maybe i’m better off in the long run what would i think of if i wasn’t thinking about this a dog named lavender a home in idaho a book about landscapes what would i make if i wasn’t thinking about this who could i be if i wasn’t thinking about this?
Poem recommended by:
Neeyati
Why I chose this poem:
(The poem can be read top-bottom or side to side) (See "Poem Source" link)
It speaks to the mental clutter that people of color (or anyone with a visible marginalized identity) carry around, which is political because it's a drain on resources: time, energy, and emotional well-being. The poem is a good visual and auditory representation of the constant loop of microaggressions followed by invalidation that ultimately makes racism "our" problem to solve and distracts from all other endeavors: "what would i think of if i wasn't thinking about this / ...who could i be if i wasn't thinking about this?"